• Fiery Hawk Worst Auditions

‘Fiery Hawk’: My 4 Worst Auditions… So Far.

The most damning response I’ve received for an audition was: “…acting’s hard, isn’t it?” Apparently I just didn’t cut the mustard for Cinderella in panto. In the 3 years since I graduated from drama school, I’ve experienced a plethora of embarrassing, hilarious, reaffirming and downright terrifying auditions. It is without a doubt my favourite thing to ask a new cast— what has been your worst audition? Actors with anecdotes, I love you with all my heart.

Ailsa Joy

Ailsa is an actor, writer, usher and tourguide, with a CV-enhancing ‘startled woodland animal’ look.

Humour, Journal|
  • acting with dyslexia by headshot thunter

Acting with Dyslexia

It wasn’t until I got to Drama School that I realised the irony of my career choice. I thought that doing something practical, ‘Acting’ would work to my strengths. Little did I know that being an Actor is about 70% reading and, of that, at least half is reading out loud in front of people, usually to try and persuade someone to give you a job. Words are not my strong point. In fact, they are something I actively avoided when growing up.

I’m dyslexic.

Why did I become an actor again?

Philip Duguid-McQuillan

Philip is or has been an actor, dyslexic, Bradfordian, awkward door opener, co-op agency member, waiter, DVD collector, barman, restaurant table coordinator, ‘please take these’ flyer-er & dream weaver of headshot photographer comparison website www.headshothunter.co.uk.

  • Casting Directors

Dear Casting Directors: Don’t Leave Us Hanging

So you’ve got a meeting. For a telly.
And it’s going pretty well.

You’ve worked with the director before and you share an anecdote that makes the producer and the casting director wet themselves.

And they laugh when you talk about the dog.

And the lines come easily, and the scene feels good.

And when the director asks you to be more front foot and faster, you are more front foot and faster. And the director nods at you and winks, like, that was what I wanted.

And they smile and nod when you get up to leave.

And the casting director squeezes your hand and whispers ‘Fantastic as ever’ as you leave.

So you go home buzzing a bit.

And you give up your seat to an older man on the tube and people smile at you. Nice guy.

So you ring your agent.

Trevor Cooper

Actor for 36 years and counting. Also a Voice-Over Artist, Singer, Assistant Choreographer and *genuine* Ballet Mistress, Drama Coach, Acting Teacher, Stage-Fighter (2nd attempt), Designated Driver, Ex-Husband, Security Guard, Minicab Driver, Friend, Son, Brother, Lover …and Good Company Member.

  • Actor Tax

Merry F*cking T*xmas! I think I’m Going To Jail

19th December 2014

Dear Ms Elin-Salt,

Thank you for your recent expenses. I have done some calculations and your tax bill for the year 2013 – 2014 will be £**** (insert terrifying and ridiculous figure here) for the first instalment in January and a further £**** (ditto) for the second in July.

Despite this, have a very merry Christmas.

Katie Elin-Salt

Katie is an actor, singer and musician from Bridgend in South Wales now living in London. She has done some nice bits of work in all these things over the last few years that she’s chuffed with.

Aside from this – most commonly known Princess Elsa on weekends, she has also starred as Peppa Pig and Supergirl in various children’s parties across the UK. You may also recognise Katie from working in the returns section of Ann Summers Cardiff at Christmas 2010. Series Regular of Judge Judy (Playing person watching it on the sofa whilst once again not in the gym)

Humour, Journal|
  • surviving actors

An Actor’s Guide To Surviving Christmas

🎶 It’s the mooooost wonderful tiiiiime of the yeeeeeear…

With the kids jingle-belling and everyone telling you to MAYBE START THINKING ABOUT A PGCE BECAUSE YOU WERE ALWAYS SUCH A CLEVER CHILD AND AUDITION FOR EMMERDALE AND PERHAPS ITS TIME TO COME BACK FOR GOOD AS THE PROPERTY LADDER ISN’T GETTING ANY SHORTER AND THE MORTGAGE ADVISORS WILL LAUGH IN YOUR VERY FACE ON THOSE WAAAAAGES  🎶

Katie Elin-Salt

Katie is an actor, singer and musician from Bridgend in South Wales now living in London. She has done some nice bits of work in all these things over the last few years that she’s chuffed with.

Aside from this – most commonly known Princess Elsa on weekends, she has also starred as Peppa Pig and Supergirl in various children’s parties across the UK. You may also recognise Katie from working in the returns section of Ann Summers Cardiff at Christmas 2010. Series Regular of Judge Judy (Playing person watching it on the sofa whilst once again not in the gym)

  • Networking

Mint Tea for One: Why am I Crap at Networking?

I’m in a coffee shop with my headphones on, trying to dull the sound of the man next to me shoveling soup, disgustingly into his gob. I’m listening to actors on a podcast about acting, talking about acting. The guest is apparently quite good at it, even though he sounds pretty downbeat about the whole affair and as I continue to listen, I cannot help but audibly say the words ‘I’d kill for your life mate’, which causes the disgusting man slurping soup, to stop and stare at me. We look at each other for a second, before he continues to gorge noisily.

Richard Popple

Brilliant actor according to his Mum. Walks a lot according to his iphone app. ‘Good ear’ for most accents, according to Spotlight. Reads good bedtime stories, according to his four-year old niece. Capable at sports.

Industry, Journal|
  • depression

Four difficult little words: “I am an actor”

Too often I don’t feel like an actor.

I can count on both hands the number of acting jobs I’ve had since drama school, and I can count on one hand the number of paid acting jobs I’ve had since then. I’m embarrassed and frustrated by my lack of movement in this profession. In fact, when people ask me what I do, I say that I’m pursuing an acting career; rarely, do I say that I’m an actor because I feel that would imply that I’m a working actor, or at least someone auditioning on a regular basis. If I’m being truly honest, am I even really pursuing an acting career?

Laura Gourdine

Actress/Actor (doesn’t matter to me), Singer, tree hugger and lover of smiles. Actor in theory longing to be an actor in practice. Would make a great phone-a-friend when in need of answers for history trivia and random info.

  • Pilot Season

Pilot Season, Schmilot Season: The search for power in an industry that gives you none

The entertainment industry isn’t kind. It doesn’t do anyone any favours. It can be rewarding. But it also causes heartbreak. Lots. Of. Heartbreak.  It amplifies people’s insecurities.  It makes people feel badly about themselves. It can give people hope but it can mislead you.  So the question is, why do we keep going back?

Jamie Spilchuk

Actor, voice over, writer, husband, California traveler, pirate wannabe, and craft table lover. Thinks he’s good at golf, softball and going to the gym…pretty mediocre at all three. One time saw a man that looked like an actual ape but it was never corroborated (most likely a dream) yet, has been looking for him ever since. Jerry Seinfeld is his Religion.

Comment, Industry, Journal|
  • tearing tickets

Tearing Tickets: Hiding in Plain Sight

“Am I as much as being seen?” Play, Samuel Beckett
They probably cover it at some institutions already, but one thing my three years at drama school didn’t teach me was the importance of a good resting job.  Some might argue that such an idea is counter-intuitive – obviously you’re going to have a career that doesn’t necessitate anything but acting work.  Or you’re going to quit within the first six months.  But for 99.7% of those graduates that make a go of it, that isn’t the case.*

Chris Tester

Box office monkey, bartender, usher/auditorium interventionist, workshop leader, Ian/Dan/Mike (delete as appropriate) the ‘awkward’ finance manager with problems that need to be discussed in a role-play context, Sarah Kane scholar, (FIFA) football manager, Menzies lookalike and Cumberbatch soundalike, personal trainer and capable carrier of spears (both actual and metaphoric).

Journal, Muggle Life|
  • katie redford coronation street

The 5 Questions Actors Hate Being Asked

My local hairdressers think I’m an Accountant.

I’m not. Jesus, I’d be shit at it. I had to retake my Maths at GCSE and anything to do with finance makes me sweat. But it just sort of…popped out one day. Every time I tell someone that I’m an Actress, I get asked a few particular questions. And I know, from speaking to other Actors, I’m not alone. So, I thought I’d share my top 5 questions I get asked, with you. Just to make you feel like you’re not suffering alone.

Katie Redford

Actress/Writer/Face for the Radio

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